Dating in the Here and Now: Be Still, My Beating Heart!

You’re convinced you’ve found the one. Everything about them sends your heart a flutter: their smile, their eyes, their laugh. You’ve never been so sure in your entire life. It must be… Love? We all do it; we all think of how things will turn out, we all conjure up different scenarios and get ahead of ourselves. But how can we be sure? How can we know for certain this is the one?

The crux of the matter is: we can’t. 

We’re not going to tell you what is and what isn’t true love, what we can do is give you some pointers on how to date in the here and now, how to hold your horses and enjoy the present whilst not overlooking opportunities for happiness. 

Slow and Steady

Moving too fast emotionally in a new relationship could isolate either one of you – pace yourself. If one of you isn’t ready to take the next step in your relationship, you might unintentionally force the other away. If you both dive in head first, the landscape of your relationship could change for the worse when those rose-tinted glasses are removed. Love isn’t a race, but more often than not, slow and steady rings true.

Don't put them on the spot

Nothing jars a new relationship quite as much as one of you saying those three little words prematurely! And nothing makes someone more uncomfortable than being asked, ‘do you love me?’ far too soon into a new relationship. Putting them on the spot is unfair – relationships are about mutual feeling and understanding, not individual needs. 

Spend time away from them 

Absence makes the heart grow fonder – another cliché, but a true one! Spending time away from your new squeeze can show you more about your feelings for them that you’d expect. Look for the signs you’re smitten… Countless places, objects and songs remind you of them. Whenever you’re having fun, you find yourself wishing they were there to enjoy it with you. You get butterflies when your phone goes off, and you’re disappointed if it’s not a text from them! 

Listen to your friends and family

We all think we know ourselves quite well, but no one knows us better than our close friends and family. Sometimes you can’t see the wood for the trees – having close friends and family who have your best interests at heart can really help you look at a new relationship from a different perspective. More often than not, their observations on your relationship will be correct, so listen up!

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